Do you wake up every day; look in the mirror, and say, “This is not the life I want?

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. 

You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible

 that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. 

On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.” ~ Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi

“Do you feel like you’re stuck in a rut? Do you wake up


every day; look in the mirror, and say, “This is not the life I want?” Do you find yourself being constantly taken for granted? If you are facing such a situation then you are lacking confidence in yourself.

Self - confidence is the confidence one has in oneself, one’s knowledge, and one’s abilities. It is the confidence of the type: "I can do this". "I have the ability to do this". Confidence is the one thing that is much more important than many other abilities and traits. It’s normal for motivation to wax and wane. Sometimes people feel extremely motivated to accomplish their goals, and at other times they feel little motivation. But feeling no motivation to do anything is not normal, and indicates that you have a serious problem. Usually, the root cause of an absence of motivation is low self esteem or lack of confidence. If you do not have self-confidence, what you do will never become fruitful at all. The fruits of what you do without self-confidence are lost. Being confident is the first step to progress, development, achievement, success and happiness.

What does that voice in the back of your mind say? What makes you uncomfortable or ashamed of yourself? This could be anything from over-weight, to personal losses, friends at school or a past traumatic or negative experience. Whatever is making you feel unworthy, ashamed or inferior, identify it, give it a name, and write it down. Many things can make you lose your confidence or have low self-esteem. Don’t worry about those things. The good news is that it’s never late to boost your confidence. You can change your life! Change is the one constant thing in this world. Your life can change, but whether it changes for the better or for worse depends on you. You don’t have to settle for mediocrity, and live a life that you were not meant to live.

Even if you have a lot of abilities and a lot of knowledge, if you do not have confidence you cannot be a success. But, on the contrary, even if you have only average abilities and knowledge, if you have an unfailingly true self-confidence, chances are that you achieve what you want to. By improving one’s self-acceptance, self-concept, and self-image, one can improve one's self-esteem. Unless one is not able to love oneself, like oneself respect and accept oneself as one is -- with all the defects one has -- it is not possible to have self-esteem. People do not accept one who does not accept himself.

If you want to be confident feel confident, but what if you're starting with little or no confidence? A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence are a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Remember that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality.

Learn that life is full of bumps down the road. And that often these insecure feelings come and go, depending on where we are, who we are with, the mood we're in, how we are feeling. In other words, they are not constant. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence. There's no quick fix. Get to the root of the problem; focus on it and understand that you need to resolve each issue before you can move on. Check if it's an old past emotion and if it is really still relevant or applicable in your life today. And that doesn't mean you have to get rid of whatever makes you feel bad (many times, you simply can't). You need to learn to accept yourself, your past and your circumstances as they are, without necessarily thinking of them as "bad".

Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized. Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, etc. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. When you're following your passion, not only will it have a therapeutic effect, but you'll feel unique and accomplished, all of which can help build your confidence.

Avoid self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior--they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. So by looking in the mirror everyday and smiling, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run. Along the same lines of smiling to make yourself feel happy, acting confident might actually make you believe it. Pretend you're a completely confident version of you; go through the motions and see how you feel! It might be tough, but if you don't have something you can believe in, you don't have anything. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything.

No matter what's happened in your life, you can always lay claim to the fact that from this day forward, you've followed your principles to the best of your ability. Be positive. Think of your wins and successes. Think of your achievements as your positive traits. Find out new opportunities. Be optimistic and be realistic. Start to act confidently and positively. Write down all your positives, strengths, virtues. Write down the recent successes and achievements you had. Keep the list with yourself and append it whenever possible. This will go a long way in boosting your ego and confidence.

Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends! Mingle yourself with people who are optimistic, positive and active. Work with those who have confidence in themselves and in you. Avoid the company of those who destroy your Self-confidence and enthusiasm. Help others whole heartedly without expecting anything (even thanks) in return. Help others just for the sake of helping. You will gradually gain more and more confidence by this. Again, some day, someone will reciprocate these in some way or other. At least that way, you will build up more and more goodwill for yourself. When you know you're kind to the people around you, and are making a positive difference in other people's lives (even if it's just being kinder to the person who serves you coffee in the morning or simply smiling at a complete stranger), you'll know that you are a positive force in the world--which will boost your self confidence.

Always take life with a pinch of salt and a smile as often as possible. What do I mean by this? As you take life in your stride always remember that happiness and success are waiting at the threshold. So smile, for you are aware that happiness and success are waiting around the corner. Remember that when one door closes other doors open up before you. Believe that there are plenty of opportunities and look for them untiringly and with hope. Be friendly and approachable. Believe in yourself and in your abilities. Be active and enthusiastic. Plan up all your actions and do it effectively and efficiently. Do it heartily. Speak confidently. Don’t' be indecisive. When you are aware of your goal, you'll not be indecisive.

Therefore my friends, reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction. Genuine confidence is the forerunner of all achievements. Confidence really integrates the powers of your mind and body and focuses them towards the goal. Only such a concentrated energy can reach the goal of success and happiness.